Jan 31, 2008

How am I doing? (RIP John Raiden Gauge, my beautiful baby boy)


Honestly? Pretty fucking shitty… But I guess I just have to live my life… Which personally I don't even want to do that right now… Things have been really difficult and hard for John and I in the past 2 weeks…. Some days seem better than others but at the end of the day it's all the same…. Though, I can say that my husband is a wonderful man, and I love him more now than ever… He has given me strength that I didn't even know I had… And has made me realize that I never want to take him for granted ever again… We have been through a lot of shit together, but this definitely tops all…


It was so hard giving birth to a beautiful baby boy and us looking at him, holding him, touching him, loving him, and knowing we were going to have to give him up… It sucked leaving the hospital empty handed with nothing left but memories… And since then I have been nothing but an emotional wreck, left with only questions of "WHY"… Why did this have to happen? Why me? Why my little boy? Why not someone else's? Why can't I keep my baby? Why does everyone else get to keep theirs? Why was mine taken from me? Why couldn't I have died instead of my little boy? Why couldn't I take his place? And yet, none of my questions can and will never be answered… Sadly to say, I've come to hate the world and everyone in it… Especially pregnant women, and people I see with newborns… Not because I want to, but because it seems like it's my first instinct now… People ask me how I'm doing, and my first thought that runs through my head is "How the fuck do you think I'm doing?! I just lost my son, you fucking dumb ass, go fuck yourself!"  But I smile, and politely say "ohhhh alright I guess" 

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I gave birth to John Raiden Gauge on Wednesday, January 16, 2008, at 7:37 am… He weighed 4 lbs 8.9 ounces and was 17.5 inches long… His head was 33cm and chest was 32.5cm…  Full term he would have been over 9 lbs…  He was definitely a big baby, and got all the food he ever needed that's for sure!!!  He has his mommy's brown eyes, and his daddy's brown hair…. He's the most beautiful baby I've ever laid eyes on… He looks so much like his mommy, daddy says he's a spitting image… But I personally think he has John's nose but John thinks he has mine… He's the best thing that has ever happened to either one of us… He's ours, we created him, and we love him more than anything in the world, with all of our hearts… Letting him go has been the hardest thing that has happened to either one of us… But he will always be in our hearts, we just wish we had more time with him…

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You haven't experienced anything until you have experienced losing a child… John and I have gone through the worse thing that any parent has gone through, and it sucks… And if it wasn't for each other, we would have both went crazy already… The love and support from family and friends has been wonderfully overwhelming… You guys are great!! And we love each and every one of you…. Thanks so much for being there for us… It was truly a blessing… And if it wasn't for my mom and real dad flying out last minute, John and I would have been completely lost and not gotten anything done or taken care of… Samantha, I love you so much… You are truly my best friend, and I am so grateful that you came out and stayed with me the whole time I was in the hospital! You even stayed by my side through the delivery and everything, which you didn't have to at all, you could have gone outside but you didn't! I love you!  All of you that have sent us messages on here, thanks, we really do appreciate it, even though I haven't written any of you back, I just haven't been up for talk….

John and I are definitely going to try for number two… Hopefully soon but not too soon… We've been talking about it a lot lately… But nothing will ever replace our first son….

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