2011 New Years Resolution

Making a resolution is the act of "resolving" something.  Most people have made resolutions to better their life in one way or another.  But I have past the point in my life where my life doesn't need resolving.  In the past 5 years I have had the most hostile trials that life could throw at me,  I think most of you know what these are and there is no need to address them.  I can honestly say that I have experienced more in life at the age of 24 than most grown people at the age of 50 can say for themselves.  John and I will be married for 5 years in 4 days and we get along better than most marriages in their 20 years,  we even beat the odds of a military marriage (thank you Raiden) and that says a lot.  Only us and 1 other couple are still married out of all the marriages in Johns last unit.  We are more financially stable than over 80% of the people we know.  We are literally happy and healthy for the first time in a long time and there really isn't anything I would like to resolve in the up coming year.. I  am so grateful and thankful for what I have that I could not ask for anything better.  Why in the world would I want to fix that?! --There was a time when I would have never thought I would say anything remotely close to that!!

So after long contemplation, my new years resolution is just this:  To live life... 

With that being said, I hope that you don't take the things in life for granted and that you can accept the things you cannot change and maybe next year your life won't need "resolving" either! Be thankful for what you have because someone out there might just have it worse than you, I know because I have been there...


Now let's ring in the new year right!!!!
BOTTOMS UP!!!!

Things that go bump in the night

For the past few nights, (not really sure how many exactly, but who is counting) I have been waking up between the wee hours of 4:30 and 5 in the am.  It doesn't matter what time I go to sleep either.   One time I went to bed at 10 pm, another I went to bed at 2 am.  I still wake up at the exact same time and oddly enough, it has literally been from a dead sleep and takes me hours to fall back into my previous slumber, thus leaving me sleeping in until 11 every day.  What does this mean? What is waking me up, or should I say whom and why?

According to Sylvia Brown, (who has said the same thing to dozen of believers that have asked her the same question as to who or what is causing them to wake up from their deep sleep and is reoccurring night after night) it is a loved one who has passed on and is watching over us as we sleep.... Seems a little far fetched for some of you? Was for me at first, or maybe it just never crossed my mind because the only thing I was focused on is "how in the hell am I going to fall back asleep now that I'm wide awake?!"  This time was different... I woke up as usual, in pitch darkness, looked over at the clock which read 5:00, looked up at the ceiling, closed my eyes, leaned my head toward my right shoulder, opened my eyes, and just started crying.  Crying, not because the hubs was sleeping in the middle of the bed leaving me only two inches before the edge of it, but because my heart was heavy...  So heavy that it felt like it was in my gut and the only person on my mind... Raiden.  I have been thinking about him a lot lately,(usually because it is that time of year again) but at that moment, I felt him.  It was as if he was standing right there at my bed side... Just.... Watching me... I felt, almost euphoric, hope, happy, my heart slowly becoming less heavy.  I closed my eyes for what seemed like several minutes, but was only for a few seconds, immediately quit crying, opened my eyes again, and just like that, he was gone.  I didn't feel him standing there anymore.  But I wasn't sad, and still wasn't tired.  I just lied there for several minutes staring at the wall and ceiling, wondering what all this meant. 

Was it Raiden? Who else could it have been? I wouldn't have felt him had it been someone else.  What was he trying to tell me?  Maybe he was telling me that everything is going to be okay... He knew I have been thinking about him a lot lately, and thinking about him makes me sad and depressed... Maybe he was letting me know that he is okay... But after 3 years of wondering? Why now? I mean I knew he was okay, but was this his way of a confirmation?  Or was this just solely for the sake of comforting me?  I have never felt his presence so strong until today, and I wonder if it will be the last.  The feeling I felt, can never be scripted from words,  I just felt weightless.  It almost seems as if it wasn't even real at all. Like it was just a dream.  Was I just dreaming with my eyes open?  I guess these are the things we never really know for sure...

9/11

Sometimes I wish that more people would come at this day a little more humble than others.  I know that there are so many men who come at this day with a heavy heart, who know and have experienced the repercussion of this day first hand, my husband included.  There is still a war going on, and while everyone is going about their day as if it were any other day, there are sacrifices being made.  I use to look at these people who have seem to "forget" in a negative light, but today, I don't blame them.  I probably would be the same way had I not married a Marine who risks so much of his life to defend my freedom and yours or became friends with the one's whose lives have been lost as well as so many women who have been in my shoes.  Some people don't realize how lucky they are to live in the land of the Free because of the Brave.  When we ask you to "Never Forget" we mean it! Be thankful for your freedom and the men who fought for you to keep it!  I am thankful everyday for my husband and that he is alive and well, the scars he holds from this war doesn't even compare to what could have been...

Destination: Lamai Beach, Koh Samui, Thailand

As you all know by now (and if not then you should) that my nationality is Thai, hence my name.  But were you also aware that I am a beach?!! Not to be mistaken for the word "bitch", though we all know that I am one of those as well... But that's right, I am a beach, and I have to admit that I am down right, slap you in the face, beautiful!!! 

Right off of Thailand there is this little island filled with beautiful white sand beaches, clean, clear warm water, lush tropical gardens and a gentle ocean breeze.  Koh Samui is an island of natural beauty (like myself :)) and charm, it can be kicked back and relaxed or active and fast paced.

Right on the coast of this little island known as Koh Samui is a little town called Lamai, and Lamai is equipped with a beach yall!  Lamai Beach is Koh Samui's second largest beach, and some says that it is having the most beautiful beach in Samui. The sea water caters for excellent swimming and the beach is studded with graceful granite boulders, which are often enjoyed as fishing perches by local fishermen.

Dont believe me that this island paradise exists? Check out this map! >>>

Yep that is right it does exist! See it right there smack dab in the middle of the right side coast!

This place is absolutely breath taking... And I have officially decided that I am putting Lamai Beach on my bucket list! This is something I have to do before I die.  Not only because we share the same name, but also because it is a part of my heritage, who I am and where I came frome. (Well technically I came from Oklahoma, that's where I was born anyways).  So you get the idea... Thailand is my nationality, it's only natural that I want to go back to my roots, and start digging where it all started.  Some day, some how, I'm gonna make it, alright but not right now.  (nickelback reference! LOVE IT).  Some day I'm going to make it to Thailand to see Lamai Beach, probably sometime in my 40's or 50's when I'm well into my "doctorhood", but I'll make it there before I die! 

For you to get a better picture of how beautiful this place really is, here are some pics of Lamai Beach... The pictures DO NOT do it justice! (I know because it's Lamai, and I'm Lamai).

Look how clear that water is!

This just cracked me up!!!!

Here is a video for your viewing pleasure of Hat Lamai (Lamai Beach) *enjoy!

As always! Thanks for tuning in!!!

MaiTai

From memoirs, to resolutions, to new beginings....

It's a brand new day and a brand new year and needless to say I cannot do much of a year in review. 2009 went by so fast. John was retired from the Marine Corps with an 80% disability, and is eligible for the full 100%, which is currently in process and being reviewed as we speak. A business opportunity just fell into his lap, and is something that the both of us are forever grateful for and although it is something that I would love to talk about it, it is just not the right time. Once the dust clears I will be more than willing and come mid January we should know a little more of what's going on. For the majority of 2009, I buried myself in school work. I know, it is not fun for most, but I enjoyed it and it gets me one step closer to becoming a doctor. I even came across an empty soul this past year, and happily cut the strings and moved on with my life. And while they are still dwelling in the past, they are not that important enough for me to do the same, which is why I cut those strings and attachments in the first place. I am focused on the future and this person is nowhere in sight!




So what does this New Year have in store for me? A new life, full of opportunities. John and I have finally found the road to success. Although the end of that road is quite a ways off and is hard to decipher through the vast distance, I am somewhat relieved that we found it and I have grown more patient since finding it. I know it is going to take some time, and right now I am just along for the ride. We would like to buy a house, but with this mess of not knowing with the business we are not sure which direction to look. But on the contrary, I have a couple of houses picked out back at home in the MO. But if we bought a house in the MO we probably won't be there for long. On the other hand, if we get a house back home, I would be more content while John is traveling with the business and will be close to friends and family, however, I hate "home". It is extremely hard for me to coexist with the whole small town, small mind thing that goes on. There is a whole different world over the hedge Vernon County!!! Granted not everyone has the whole "hillbilly dumbness" going on. Still, it is not my cup of tea. I would like to move back to California. California will always have a place in my heart. It was my first taste of the real world, it was my home for 4 years, it was a fresh slate for me and even though I said I hated it, I grown to love it and what it had to offer. But California is way too far away from the business. The business if based out of Washing DC. So DC is an option for us. And then there is Boston, which is where my cousin lives, who happens to own this business. So that is an option, I would love to see Massachusetts! Just don’t know if I want to live there. I think that maybe subconsciously I am scared shitless of moving to the East Coast. For the simple fact that 2012 is right around the corner. Hey I am not saying I believe, but anything is possible. And another fact is DC is a hot spot for terrorists! I don’t want to get my ass blown off, I know for a fact we are still at war, I mean my husband just came from there! That is scary, when I think of DC flashes of 9/11 storm through my head. None of that shit happened on the West Coast! It's clear on the other sides of the map, nothing but local gang shootings, which by the way have gone down.



We don’t have to make a decision on where we want to live right now. This is good for me, because I just cannot decide. For the first six months, John will be working out of Chicago, so that will give me plenty of time to decide on here or there or elsewhere. So that is pretty much what the year 2010 has in store for me. Not that exciting! Cheers to a new year anyway!



Thanks for tuning in!

MaiTai